Do not strike out - News
Gabe Kapler, best known as a 2004 Boston Red Sox outfielder, is now using his name to champion his own cause: preventing domestic violence.
The Sigma Sigma Sigma sorority, welcomed Kapler and his wife, Lisa, to the Curry Student Center Wednesday night to speak about The Gabe Kapler Foundation and to sign autographs.
Janet Actis, a member of the sorority's programming committee, said the Kaplers would grab the attention of students because of their ties to the Red Sox.
"Now, people will know that there are things that can be done about this kind of violence," Actis said.
Since 2004, the Kaplers have been lecturing on domestic violence because, at age 14, Lisa was abused by her high school boyfriend. She is now committed to spreading awareness through the foundation with her husband, she said.
Gabe began the evening by recounting the events of July 24, 2004. Jason Varitek had shoved his catcher's mitt into the face of Alex Rodriguez, the New York Yankees' third baseman.
However, this kind of behavior shouldn't translate to the real world, he said.
"On the field, in the heat of battle, sometimes violence is unavoidable," he said. "When you're with someone you care about, violence is always avoidable."
Kapler then began to conceptualize the meaning of being a strong man. Gabe, who stands at 6 feet 2 inches and weighs 210 pounds, wasn't talking about physical strength, but rather the bravery of inaction.
"My ability to not … react physically is what makes me strong," he said.
Gabe said he has learned from his wife that one act of violence can quickly escalate into something more terrifying.
The first time Lisa's boyfriend abused her was after an argument at school, Gabe said. He took her by the throat and shoved her up against a locker."All the kids [who] saw it were walking past … nobody said anything to me," Lisa said while starting to choke up. "It's 18 years later and it's still affecting me."
She said her boyfriend promised it would never happen again, but things continued to spiral out of control. At one point, Lisa's boyfriend held a gun to her head and asked her if she was ready to die.But he would always apologize and she would go back to him, she said.
"I learned to be a victim. … There's a very big piece of addiction that goes along with abuse," Lisa said.
She said she was abused for almost three years.
However, the hardest part didn't come until six years later. Lisa was at a stoplight when she looked to the car next to her and saw her former boyfriend in the driver's seat with a baby car seat in the back.
She said she felt by not turning him into the police or getting him the help he needed, she allowed the cycle to continue. Now Lisa said she fears he could be hurting his children.
"I passed the baton for someone else to be abused," she said.
The Kaplers agreed the best way to prevent violence and promote a healthy relationship is through communication, which is something they said they still work on constantly. The trick is just finding the best way to communicate, they said.
Although they spent the majority of the evening talking about violence prevention, Northeastern students addressed the rumor that Gabe wants to return to the Red Sox outfield next season."I think there's a little crack in the Red Sox door, and I'm going to try to bang it down," Gabe said with a smile.